TYLER HAWES

This is a sign that you should definitely buy this shirt for that person you forgot to buy a gift for. This person might be yourself. This symbol stand for whatever you need it to. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing

The fun, grumpy, subtly stressed out classic character that nobody remembers and shouldn’t remember. An instant conversation starter. Woah pal hold up, you might really need to buy this shirt. Never stress again, Alfredo will carry your struggles and distract others from your frazzled, ugly face. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

If you choose to buy this shirt (good choice), be careful where you choose to wear it. You may make those around you very hungry, or possibly fog up any windows or glasses with the thick steam coming off this here girthy hot sausage bun. And hey, that brat doesn’t look nearly as hot as you will while wearing this thing 🥵 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Are you tired of those dang hippos lighting up the night with their virtuosic sensual classic R&B vocal stylings? Well now you can let everyone know. The hippos must be silenced for the sake of all the human R&B singers and the future of humanity as a whole. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

There’s nothing like vague abstract sci-fi imagery to take your lame wardrobe game to the next level. What are those squiggly things? Who is that being that’s passing through, and what are they chasing? Who are they running from? This is your universe now. Still. Unchanging. Unless you wash the shirt too aggressively, then it might fade away. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Like a wise man and bass god once said, you can’t hold no groove if you ain’t got no pocket. With a one time purchase of this shirt, if you do in fact ain’t got no pocket, you will at least have a shirt that says pocket, and that’s truly something. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Trust me, you don’t want to cross this harp. He’ll slice and dice ya right in the blowhole, you’ll draw your last breath guaranteed. Luckily, our team has managed to capture this deviant reedy menace and sealed him away in the threads of this dope shirt. Buyer beware! If you overblow the 10th hole his spirit shall be released. MD is not responsible for any havoc that ensues beyond this point. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Where does it come from? Where does it go? This 100% Cotton Eyed Joe will keep your belly warm on a hot summer day, and that’s just science. With our patented shirt-mesh technology, this shirt doubles as a travel stovetop. Simply wear it, lay in the sun, then crack and egg right on your solar plexus. Wow! It really works! 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Inspired by one of the first things my Grandpa Hawes taught me to draw. This shirt would make a hilarious booty towel for someone with a bidet. It would arguably make an equally hilarious shirt. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

A shirt for those who wish to celebrate all sports simultaneously. I sure did catch the game and regardless of win or loss, there were some good moments and some bad ones. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Have you ever made your bellybutton talk? Now you can legally do this anywhere with our new talking bellybutton bib! Not only does it protect your bellybutton from overfilling with crumbs from all the food you eat, but it also functions as a mask for your general body puppet escapades! 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

This sword is short. Kinda looks like it’s from some specific cartoon. But what cartoon? None of them? Sure. But swords are pretty cool. Wait… is this one… cute??? It’s all subjective bro. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

This is the shirt you're supposed to buy your single friends for Valentine's Day. I bet you they won't ever wear it, but hey, it'll work real well to dry their tears or wipe up the ice cream they got all over themselves as they watch TV for too many hours alone, again, just like every Friday night. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

If peas could use earpods to listen to music, where would they put them? Can they even, or are they just limited to loud speakers and ambient sounds? Can peas hear at all? And if peas were sentient, would each pea be its own person? Or would the whole pod be a person? Is it more of a hive mind situation? This shirt is inspired by fantasy. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

Man! These were the days! Remember??? They just don’t make music like they used to. What a band! I heard the lead singer only drank from juice boxes… 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!

If you want a shirt with a symbol on it that looks like it was maybe carved into a tree on some sacred ground, then this is the shirt for you. If that’s not your bag, then this is a sign to buy a different shirt. Try the Hippo one. That’s much less vague. 100% cotton / open-end yarn / tubular fabric / taped neck and shoulders / double seam at sleeves and bottom hem / very stylish and jealously inducing!